Teach your Children

Sermon for North Hill Adventist Fellowship

Sabbath, January 14, 2012

Text: Deuteronomy 6:1-12, 24-25.

Recently, we were sitting around in the kitchen talking. My kids were going on at great length about their political views. I was sitting there mostly listening, thinking, My what smart kids. They agree with me!

Why is it that frequently, young people who regard themselves as Independents, have Independent parents, kids who think and argue Republican views have Republican parents and Democrats have parents who vote Democrat? It's not universal, of course. We are not locked in to the political views of our parents, but commonly political perspectives run in families. Parental influence is powerful.

Last Sunday I went for a hike with a young friend. We stopped for lunch at a dramatic overlook at the top of a cliff. He began peeling an orange. He tossed the first piece of peeling over the edge. I reacted in horror. “I have a trash bag,” I said. “Let me have your peelings.”

He was as surprised by my reaction as I was at his act of tossing orange peelings off the cliff. He was willing for me to pack out his peelings, but he didn't get it. Orange peelings are organic. We were out in the middle of nowhere. We couldn't see the bottom of the cliff. What was the harm in tossing orange peelings. Maybe a bird would build a nest with it.

“No.” I said. “Birds won't use it to build a nest. And it won't rot. At least not very fast. Out here, orange peelings are litter. There are trails down in the valley that might take people to the base of the cliff. The rule is: pack it in. pack it out.”

His littering made sense, given his family history. Not an environmentalist among them. No one to champion “leave no trace.” No one to articulate the idea of our responsibilities as stewards of creation. No one to help him understand the importance of packing everything out.

The Bible directs us to teach our children. It is a weighty responsibility. And the reality is, whether we are aware or not, we are teaching them. So we might as well pay attention to what we are doing.

Deuteronomy 6.

These are the commands, decrees and laws the LORD your God directed me to teach you to observe in the land that you are crossing the Jordan to possess, so that you, your children and their children after them may fear the LORD your God as long as you live by keeping all his decrees and commands that I give you, and so that you may enjoy long life.

Hear, O Israel, and be careful to obey so that it may go well with you and that you may increase greatly in a land flowing with milk and honey, just as the LORD, the God of your fathers, promised you.

Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.

These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

The LORD commanded us to obey all these decrees and to fear the LORD our God, so that we might always prosper and be kept alive, as is the case today. And if we are careful to obey all this law before the LORD our God, as he has commanded us, that will be our righteousness."

Moses says: I am teaching you these things so you will fear God and so your lives will go well. And you are to teach them to your children so they will fear God and their lives will go well.

Repeatedly throughout the Bible, the importance of passing on the wisdom of God shows up.

God said about Abraham: For I have chosen him, so that he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD by doing what is right and just. " Genesis 18:19.

There were "schools" of the prophets, groups of men under the authority or at least influence of the leading prophet at the time. (E.g. at Ramah, 1 Samuel 19:18; Bethel, 2 Kings 2:3; Jericho, 2 Kings 2:5; and Gilgal, 2 Kings 4:38.) 

Jesus told his followers: You are the light of the world (Matthew 5). It's not enough to “be in the light.” We are to shine.

In Matthew 28, Jesus said, “Go into all the world and teach them everything I have commanded you.”

In Acts, just before he returned to heaven, Jesus told his disciples, “You are my witnesses, both in this neighborhood and to the entire world.” Acts 1:8.

In your sermon suggestions, one of the questions you asked me to address was What are we here for? What is our purpose in life.

According to Moses, one great purpose for parents and communities is to transmit wisdom. Human babies are not born with most of what they need to know to live good lives. They must be taught. That is our job.

My mother was afraid of water. She couldn't swim. She hated riding in small boats. She had nearly drowned as a kid and the mere thought of being in water over her head terrified her. But she determined not to pass that on to her kids. So as soon as we were old enough, she enrolled us in swimming classes through the “Y.” When we headed off to summer camp, instead of warning us about the dangers of drowning, she encouraged us to take every swimming class we could. All six of us kids learned to swim. All six of us qualified as life guards. Because Mother was determined to pass on wisdom instead of fear, competence instead of disability.

The Bible urges us to be deliberate about passing on wisdom, especially the particular wisdom that is ours as Christians.

Much of what we teach our children is the same as would be taught by a Hindu or Muslim or Buddhist parent. Do good. Tell the truth. Be nice. Show respect. Be compassionate.

In addition to these universal moral ideals, we have a special story to tell. It is the Bible story. The story of a God who loves us so much he would rather die than live without us. A story that offers a unique understanding of the reconciliation of justice and mercy. A story with a special vision of the potential of humans to spend eternity with God. The Bible story is the unique treasure of the church.

To do right by our children and the world, we need to teach them both the universal ethics shared by all religions AND the unique story that is our special treasure.

In teaching the Bible, we have two assignments. We want to give our children a familiarity with the stories. The Creation and Noah. Abraham and Isaac. David and Saul and Goliath. Daniel and Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. Jesus and Peter, James and John. Paul and the garish images of Revelation.

Second, we want to teach our children a wise approach to interpreting the Bible. We ought to teach them to use the Bible as a tool for enriching life. (The Bible is a powerful tool and can be misused as an instrument of evil.)

So, following the message of the Bible itself, we teach the Bible – the stories and words of the book, and a wise, good approach to interpreting it.

This far, I'm repeating the essence of what I said last week. As a church, as parents, as grandparents, we ought to deliberately expose our children to the Bible. Bible stories. Videos. Memory verses. Bible story books. The focus here is words. Words matter. Words are important. Let's make sure our kids are thoroughly exposed to the words of the Bible, and our own words of interpretation.

So to you who work in the children's departments: Thank you. From me and from God. To you who read your children Bible stories at night: Thank you.

Now let's go beyond words. Beyond the words of the Bible. Beyond our words of instruction. What we say matters. Who we are and what we do matters even more. No matter how loudly we shout, our actions will always speak more loudly than our words.

If you have ambition for your children, the first, most important, most influential step you can take to help them achieve that dream is to move yourself in the direction you want your children to go.

Do you want your children to be respectful. Practice showing respect TO THEM!!!!!

Do you want your children to be generous, examine your own habits. Do the needs of your family (including the needs of your kids) consume all your resources?

Do you want your children to be spiritual? How much time and energy do you put into the cultivation of your own spiritual life? Is going to church sufficient? Are you spending some time in devotional reading or in praying or in meditation?

Do you want your children to study? How much serious reading or study have you done over the last year?

I don't ask the questions to scold. It's just that every parent I know dreams of good character for their children. We dream that our kids will grow up and do great things for God and humanity. We lay the foundation for that greatness by embracing in our own lives habits that support greatness.

I sometimes hear college kids talking about their dreams when it comes to their own children – children that, as far as these students are concerned, are way off in the future. These students dream that their children will be great—good, smart, strong, wise, a blessing to society.

How do we get there? How do we help our children live out these grand dreams? We work to create patterns in our own lives that will support goodness.

When I pray for children in baby-dedication services, one element I nearly always include goes something like this: “Lord, help these parents to live in such a way that their kids can safely copy them.” Because our kids will copy us. They will copy even elements in our lives they don't observe. The subtle influence of our secret lives will impact our kids.

So pursue holiness. Pursue sweetness and kindness. Pursue health. Pursue wise financial management. Pursue education. Shape the culture that will shape your kids.

This is a challenge for us as a church. We must provide good Sabbath Schools for our children. Let me be very blunt: Sabbath School for adults is not as important as Sabbath School for kids. Some of you who are sitting in adult Sabbath School need trade off. A year in adult Sabbath School, then a year in children's Sabbath School.

Secondly, we are called to make our life together safe for children to copy. Build quality friendships in the church. Do things together with someone outside of worship. Work together. Play together. Eat together.

Church is a potent agency for enhancing the well-being of kids. The world is better when we do our job well. Our kids are more likely to go to college. More likely to marry successfully. More likely to do well financially. More likely to do well health wise.

The final step in teaching our children is to trust them. Give them freedom.

Teaching is not the same as sculpting. Our children are not blocks of marble or granite that we can chisel into whatever shape we wish. They are free. We can make sure they know what we know. We can require them to know what we value and what we believe. But ultimately what they believe and value will be chosen by them, not us.

Knowing this, wisdom dictates we give them freedom before they demand it.

The final exam for the teaching by parents and church comes when we let go. You can't put off the final forever. So don't try to.

To return to the call of Moses:

These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

Do this. Then trust God and your kids. Let them run the church. Encourage them as they run the world. They will do at least as well as we have. Cheer them on.